Writing an Informal Email
IGCSE English Topic 3 7:50 English narration · English + 中文 subtitles burned in
Chapters
Transcript
Two students answer the same task: write to your friend about a place you visited.
两位同学回答同一道题：给朋友写信，说说你去过的一个地方。
Here is the first one. <slow>I visited a museum.
第一位这样写：我参观了一个博物馆。
It was good.
很好。
I went with my cousin.
我和表弟一起去的。 再见。
Goodbye.</slow> Now the same news from the second student. Guess what — I finally visited that science museum you told me about!
现在看第二位同学写同样的事：你猜怎么着——我终于去了你跟我说过的那个科学博物馆！
I loved the space room, because you can sit in a real rocket seat. Every fact is the same.
我最喜欢太空展厅，因为你可以坐进真正的火箭座椅里。
But the second student will score far higher, and today you will see exactly why.
两篇的事实完全一样，但第二位同学的分数会高得多。 今天你就会明白为什么。
An informal email to a friend or a relative.
写给朋友或亲戚的非正式电子邮件。
It is the friendliest task on the paper, and one of the easiest to score well on — once you know the shape it must have, and the one habit that lifts your content marks.
这是整张卷子里最亲切的一道题， 也是最容易拿高分的题之一——只要你掌握了它必须具备的结构， 以及那个能提升内容分的关键习惯。
We will build it in order: the prompts, the five parts, the friendly tone, and then the habit that turns an average answer into a strong one.
我们按顺序来搭建它： 提示、五个组成部分、亲切的语气，最后是那个把普通答案变成优秀答案的习惯。
Start with the task.
先看题目。
Under the instructions sit two or three short prompts, and they are the whole content mark.
指令下面有两三个简短的提示，它们就是全部的内容分。
Here, the first prompt asks where you went.
这里，第一个提示问你去了哪里。
The second asks who you went with, and what you did there.
第二个问你和谁一起去、在那里做了什么。
The third asks whether you would go again.
第三个问你还会不会再去。
Now tick each one off as you write it.
写完一个就在旁边打个钩。
A student with beautiful English who answers only two of the three prompts loses a third of the content marks — and never notices, because the email still reads perfectly well.
一个英语很漂亮、却只回答了三个提示中两个的学生，会白白丢掉三分之一的内容分， 而且自己毫无察觉。
Every informal email has the same five parts, and the examiner looks for all of them.
每一封非正式邮件都有同样的五个部分，考官会一一寻找。
At the top, a greeting on its own line: Hi Sam, with a comma.
最上面是问候语，单独占一行：Hi Sam，后面加逗号。
Then a warm opening line before you get to business — Great to hear from you!
接着是一句热情的开场白，先别急着说正事——Great to hear from you！
Then the body: one short paragraph for each prompt.
然后是正文：每个提示写一小段。
Then a friendly closing, and your first name alone on the last line.
最后是友好的结束语，以及单独一行的你的名字。
Learn this shape once and you never have to think about structure again — in the exam you can draw the five slots in ten seconds and simply fill them in.
把这个结构记住一次，以后你再也不用为结构发愁。
Learn a few of each by heart, so you never waste exam time inventing them.
每一类都背几个，这样考试时就不用现想。
To start with: Hi Sam, or Hey Anna, or Dear Ben — Dear is warm here, because the name is a first name.
开头可以用：Hi Sam，或 Hey Anna，或 Dear Ben——这里的 Dear 是亲切的， 因为后面跟的是名字。
Then the opening line, and this is the one students forget: Thanks for your email!
接着是开场白，这一句同学们最容易忘：Thanks for your email！
Great to hear from you!
Great to hear from you！
How are you?
How are you？
To close like a friend: Write back soon, See you soon, Take care.
结尾要像朋友一样：Write back soon，See you soon，Take care。
Then your first name only — never your full name, and never Yours sincerely.
然后只写你的名字——不要写全名，更不要写 Yours sincerely。
Now the tone.
接下来是语气。
Write as if you are talking to this person.
写的时候就当作你在跟这个人说话。
Use the short forms — I'm, don't, can't, it's.
使用缩写形式——I'm、don't、can't、it's。
In a formal letter they would cost you marks; here they earn them.
在正式信件里它们会扣分， 在这里它们能得分。
Keep a handful of friendly phrases ready: Guess what!
随身准备几句亲切的表达：Guess what！
I can't wait to… You won't believe… Anyway… And here is what to keep out: I am writing to inform you, I would be grateful if, Yours faithfully.
I can't wait to…… You won't believe…… Anyway…… 而这些要坚决排除：I am writing to inform you、I would be grateful if、 Yours faithfully。
One formal phrase in the middle of a friendly email breaks the whole thing.
友好邮件中间冒出一句正式表达，整封信就毁了。
Here is a small move that makes an email feel real: ask your friend something.
有一个小技巧能让邮件显得真实：向你的朋友提问。
A weak email travels in only one direction — me, me, me, goodbye.
差的邮件只朝一个方向走——我、我、我，再见。
So turn one prompt around and send it back.
所以把其中一个提示反过来抛回去。
If the task asks what you did at the weekend, tell them, then ask: what did you do?
如果题目问你周末做了什么， 你回答之后再问一句：那你做了什么？
How about you?
How about you？
Have you been yet?
Have you been yet？
Let me know what you think.
Let me know what you think。
One question near the end is enough — and it does two jobs at once: it makes the email sound like a real conversation, and it gives your closing something to lead into.
在结尾附近提一个问题就够了——而且它正好引出你的结束语。
Now the layout of the body.
接下来是正文的排版。
Many students write one long block, and inside it the three prompts are all mixed together.
很多同学写成一大块，三个提示全混在里面，考官还得自己去找。
The examiner has to hunt for them. Instead: one prompt, one paragraph.
正确的做法是：一个提示，一个段落。
Three prompts, three short paragraphs, with a blank line between.
三个提示，三个短段落，中间空一行。
And there is a bonus. When you can see the gaps, you can see at a glance whether a prompt is missing — three prompts should give you three paragraphs.
而且还有一个好处：当你能看见段落之间的空隙时， 你一眼就能看出是不是漏了提示——三个提示应该有三段。
Two paragraphs means you forgot one.
只有两段，就说明你漏掉了一个。
This is the habit that separates a good email from an average one.
这个习惯把一封好邮件和一封普通邮件区分开来。
Step one just names the idea: I loved the trip.
第一步只是说出这个想法：我很喜欢那次旅行。
True — but the examiner learns nothing, and it earns almost nothing.
是真话—— 但考官什么也没学到，几乎不得分。
Step two: add a reason.
第二步：加一个原因。
I loved the trip because we saw an old castle.
我很喜欢那次旅行，因为我们看到了一座古堡。
Better.
好一些了。
Step three: add one concrete detail.
第三步：加一个具体的细节。
I loved the trip because we saw an old castle, and you could still walk along the walls.
我很喜欢那次旅行，因为我们看到了一座古堡， 而且你还能沿着城墙走。
Same idea, three times the mark.
同一个想法，分数翻了三倍。
So never leave an idea bare — reason, example, or detail, every time.
所以永远不要让一个想法光秃秃地待着—— 每次都加上原因、例子或细节。
One more small fix, and it costs nothing.
还有一个小修正，而且不花任何代价。
Look at a typical paragraph: I went to the museum.
看这样一段：我去了博物馆。
I saw the space room.
我看了太空展厅。
I sat in a rocket seat.
我坐进了火箭座椅。
I really liked it.
我很喜欢。
Four sentences, and every one of them starts with I.
四个句子，每一句都以"我"开头。
Change how the sentence starts and it sounds like a different writer: Last Saturday I went to the museum.
换一换句子的开头，读起来就像换了一个作者：上周六我去了博物馆。
Inside, the space room was the best part.
进去以后，太空展厅是最精彩的部分。
Keep a few openings in your head — Last week, After that, Luckily, To be honest — and use two or three of them.
在脑子里备几个开头——Last week、After that、Luckily、To be honest—— 用上两三个就够了。
Linking words belong here too, but the informal ones are different. In a formal letter you write however, in addition, as a result. In an email to a friend you write but, also, and so. Same job, smaller words. And a few belong only here. Anyway brings you back to the point after you have wandered off. By the way adds something you nearly forgot. Plus adds one more reason, quickly. Actually corrects a small thing you just said. Two or three across the whole email is right. More than that, and it starts to ramble.
衔接词在这里同样有用，只是非正式的说法不一样。 在正式信件里你会写 however、in addition、as a result； 在给朋友的邮件里，你写 but、also、so。 作用相同，词更简短。 还有几个只属于这里：Anyway 把话题从跑偏处拉回来； By the way 补上一件你差点忘记的事；Plus 快速再加一个理由； Actually 纠正你刚说过的小地方。 整封邮件用上两三个就正好，用得再多，就开始啰嗦了。
Let's read a model, and watch every piece we have covered appear in it.
我们来读一篇范文，看看刚才讲过的每一部分怎样出现在里面。
Look at the greeting and the warm opening: Hi Sam.
先看问候语和热情的开场：Hi Sam。
Guess what — I finally visited that science museum you told me about!
你猜怎么着—— 我终于去了你跟我说过的那个科学博物馆！
Then the developed idea: I loved the space room, because you can sit in a real rocket seat and feel it shake.
接着是展开的想法：我最喜欢太空展厅，因为你可以坐进真正的火箭座椅， 还能感觉到它震动。
Idea, reason, detail.
想法、原因、细节。
Then the question back: How about you?
然后是反问：那你呢？
Have you been yet?
你去过了吗？
And the closing: Write back soon, Lin.
最后是结束语：Write back soon，Lin。
That is the shape.
这就是结构。
In the exam, write the same four moves at full length — aim for a hundred and twenty to a hundred and sixty words, and answer every prompt.
考试时要把这四个部分写足——争取写一百二十到一百六十个词，每个提示都要回答。
Then spend two minutes on three checks, in this order.
然后用两分钟做三项检查，按这个顺序来。
First, the length: a hundred and twenty to a hundred and sixty words.
第一，长度：一百二十到一百六十个词。
Too short and you cannot have developed your ideas; much too long and accuracy starts to slip.
太短说明你没有展开想法； 太长则准确性开始下降。
Second, the tone: read the first line and the last line together — do they sound like the same friendly person?
第二，语气：把第一行和最后一行放在一起读——听起来像同一个亲切的人吗？
Third, your usual errors: verb endings, past tenses, and the small words a, an and the.
第三，你常犯的错误：动词词尾、过去时，还有 a、an、the 这些小词。
Do not rewrite anything at this stage.
这个阶段不要重写任何东西。
You are hunting for small fixes that take seconds, not for a better sentence.
你找的是几秒钟就能改好的小毛病，而不是更好的句子。
Three things to carry into the exam.
带三件事进考场。
First, answer every prompt — count them before you start and count them again at the end.
第一，回答每一个提示——动笔前数一遍，写完再数一遍。
Second, add a reason or a detail to every idea; that single habit is worth more than any long word.
第二，给每个想法加上原因或细节；单是这个习惯，就比任何长难词都值钱。
Third, stay friendly from the first line to the last, and sign with your first name only — one Dear Sir in the middle undoes everything above it.
第三，从第一行到最后一行都保持亲切，署名只写你的名字。
Do those three, and this task becomes the easiest marks on the paper.
做到这三点，这道题就会成为整张卷子上最容易拿的分。